it's been a long time since I've last logged into this lj... I miss it.

gawd... I'm becoming a DA junkie ever since I created my photography DA account but christ.... the photography I've come across is so fucking unbelievable ;~; have even made friends with some of the artists that I watch.

case in point

but god damn you DA for being in read-only mode >\




and for random people wondering where it is I've been lurking lately, I've been on my other LJ. Given some things going on in my life, I needed a fresh start and a private place for my thoughts. No worries though, I'm still using this journal though my private thoughts are kept else where.

For those of you who know what journal it is I'm refering to, please keep it private.

It's amazing how refreshing starting over can feel.

bah!!!!!!!

bored again XD

SO!!!!!!!!!

blogcrew for Naruto ensues.


Can be found here and PIMP!

There's just one thing I want to know...
If I were to die tomorrow, what memories would you keep with you of me?

Just post your username in a comment and let people on your flist tell you what they hold of you close to their heart.

.........................I am an epic failure.........................

http://www.htloz.net/forums/showthread.php?t=4262


fucking hell XD I haven't laughed that hard in a long time XD

alrighty

which one of you called me from New York City and I missed your call today? :(

MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:15:52 PM): I need to find my goddess sprites and link them in my userinfo
din_sama (5:16:02 PM): nice
din_sama (5:16:06 PM): cause I'm awesome :D
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:16:08 PM): XD
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:16:15 PM): that and we are three :D
din_sama (5:16:38 PM): who was the third? I forget. >(
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:16:50 PM): my friend isla (aka pipsy on lj)
din_sama (5:17:13 PM): oh yeah
din_sama(5:17:14 PM): shit
din_sama (5:17:17 PM): I haven't talked to her in ages
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:17:38 PM): well, she's currently in the states on vacation
din_sama (5:17:56 PM): pfft
din_sama (5:18:00 PM): what a waste of a vacation
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:18:05 PM): lol XD!
MoriNoAkaiHonou (5:18:14 PM): -quotes you because you're awsome like that-
din_sama (5:19:04 PM): hells yeah I am, bitches



Din - Nayru - Farore
The Tri-Force


Yeah... I'mma loser >P

din_sama FTW!

For me to be reminded that I am needed by someone is a great feeling. For someone like myself, who has spent almost her entire life alone, to be wanted means something. I'm used to people coming into my life and then leaving it just as easily. People like that don't often realize how greatly they impact my life.


Even though I almost (as 99.9% of the time) never talk to indilime, I consider her one of my closest online friends. Not only that, but she's one of the oldest online friends that I have (fridge, din_sama and marieamethyst to name a few others). I care about her more than even she probably knows ♥ Just one of many examples of what a simple acknowledgement can do (I still owe you a package too Indy, don't I :x -hides- XD ♥)

Erik is someone who acknowledged me and single handedly changed my life for ever. It's been a cruel irony, but if we hadn't parted (even though it was willing), I never would have felt love. I denied the ache in my heart for eight months after we stopped talking, but shortly after, I confessed to myself that what I felt was love and love it has been. Not a day has gone by where I haven't thought of him and never has a thought gone through my head where I have not cried over him. Through my pain of losing him, however, I grow stronger. Though I have friends for whom I live, selfishly, I live to honor his memory and all that he has given me. What he has given to me I give selflessly back to others in honor of his memory even though all I want to do is die. benbarden; Although our loss is similar, our pain is different. You have a face and the knowledge that the one you care for has passed where all I have is uncertainty of a stranger of whom I have no idea how he appears. If I knew for certain that Erik was dead, only then could my heart find peace.


I'm surprised I haven't become hard in a shell with how many times I've been hurt this year. The only exception to this rule is when I moved out of my parents house and stopped having immediate access to the internet for that is one of the main reasons why I haven't talked to white_russian in nine months. Right now, she is the only person I've allowed myself to love. Just an occasional acknowledgement from her and/or post in her livejournal is part of what's keeping me grounded right now. I know she has work and a life outside of me. I'm not a selfish prick to demand that I be the sole center of her attention. I'm not like that with anyone. Just keeping my royal purple Princess Diana bear with me (along with my golden angel bear in memory of Erik), the memories that I have shared with these two people keeps me here.

benbarden; part of why I'm such a music guru is that not only does music help me to express me many moods and feelings, it helps me write and also calms me down tremendously when all I want to do is rip someone's head apart. Your music especially helps to calm me. Another reason why I've taken such an interest in your music is because I enjoy helping others when it comes to giving my opinion to help others in any form. There will never be a time when I will stop listening to your songs :)

pyro_girl; keep bugging me to write. You won't have noticed yet, but Jess and Sei have both helped me to deal with myself. Throughout the story, I'm sure you will notice parts of myself. Our many roleplays, writings, and just random chats mean the world to me. Thank you so much for getting back in contact with me ♥ it means more to me than you know :)

supafova; ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
We've been through hell, you and I, but I wouldn't change it for the world if it meant not knowing you. Love and miss you chic ♥ Hope all is well with you :)

and last but not least...

pipsy; STOP KEEP SENDING ME MUSIC. I'm obsessed enough as it is girl! ;P I have seen you overcome much in the few + years I've known you. I admire your strength and the fact you remain true to yourself no matter what anyone else wants. I wish I had that courage ♥


Despite trust having been broken several times, I continue to let people in. The fact that you people are here means that I care about you and that I trust you, no matter how small the trust may be. I'm extremely close to most of you and others I have just recently met. Just know that by walking into my life, it means I will never forget you, even if you leave.


For putting up with me...
I love you all ♥♥♥

My MP3 Player Playlist as of now:

91 tracks in playlist, average track length: 3:51
Playlist length: 5 hours 50 minutes 32 seconds

Playlist files:

1. A2 - CHOSEN ONE (3:31)
2. Breaking Benjamin - Blow Me Away (3:25)
3. Breaking Benjamin - Breath (3:38)
4. Breaking Benjamin - The Diary of Jane (3:20)
5. Breaking Benjamin - Evil Angel (3:41)
6. Breaking Benjamin - Until the End (4:12)
7. Breaking Benjamin - Dance with the Devil (3:47)
8. Breaking Benjamin - Unknown Soldier (3:46)
9. Ben Barden - Travelling (1:32)
10. Ben Barden - Sitting on the corner of the sky (2:49)
11. Ben Barden - At the Bottom of the Sea (5:55)
12. Ben Barden - The Underdog (1:29)
13. Ben Barden - Into the unknown (1:10)
14. Ben Barden - Green Fields (2:41)
15. Ben Barden - December Loneliness (3:35)
16. Ben Barden - Underground Maze (3:20)
17. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - Ocean Dive (5:53)
18. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - World of Peace (4:44)
19. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - White Butterflies (2:34)
20. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - Subterranean Labyrinth (3:20)
21. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - Blue Jade (4:06)
22. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - Aries Part 3 (1:45)
23. Ben Barden - A World Beyond - Aries Parts 4 and 5 (3:22)
24. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - Gravity (3:04)
25. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - Nebular Dreams (3:53)
26. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - Besidewalk Plight (3:02)
27. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - Pyramid (3:24)
28. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - The Path of No Return (2:08)
29. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight - The Last Ones -- Phase One (3:22)
30. Ben Barden - Ambiaze (3:15)
31. Ben Barden - Begin Spring (1:30)
32. Ben Barden - Besidewalk Plight (0:30)
33. Ben Barden - Butterfly (3:12)
34. Ben Barden - Circumference (2:25)
35. Ben Barden - Dancing on the Cliffs (3:06)
36. Ben Barden - Gravity (3:05)
37. Ben Barden - Gravity (Ben's Low Gravity Remix) (2:56)
38. Ben Barden - Midnight 1 (1:09)
39. Ben Barden - Midnight 2 (9:25)
40. Ben Barden - Moon Eclipse (6:09)
41. Ben Barden - Nine Intertwined (18:33)
42. Ben Barden - Our Memories (1:50)
43. Ben Barden - Precipitate (3:09)
44. Ben Barden - Prosperity (3:04)
45. Ben Barden - Pyramid (3:25)
46. Ben Barden - Radial Circumference (3:08)
47. Ben Barden - Silhouette (2:48)
48. Ben Barden - Storybook (1:10)
49. Ben Barden - The Path of No Return (2:06)
50. Ben Barden - The Quiet Lake (2:58)
51. Ben Barden - The Wilderness (2:45)
52. Ben Barden - Three Sides (4:42)
53. Ben Barden - Waiting for the Sun (3:46)
54. Ben Barden - Winter Tale (2:38)
55. Ben Barden - Woodland Clearing (4:39)
56. Big Wreck - That Song (5:04)
57. Clay Aiken - Lover All Alone (4:57)
58. ANTINOMIE - Euphoria (192 kbs) (3:06)
59. Final Fantasy - Crystal Chronicles - Kazenone (3:36)
60. Final Fantasy VII - Turks Theme (2:18)
61. Final Fantasy VII - J-E-N-O-V-A (2:31)
62. Final Fantasy VII - 16 One Winged Angel (7:16)
63. Final Fantasy VII - Advent Children - Disc 2 - J-E-N-O-V-A (FFVII AC Version) (2:45)
64. Final Fantasy VII - Advent Children - Disc 2 - Sairin: Kata Tsubasa no Tenshi ~Advent:One-Winged Angel~ (6:06)
65. Gundam Seed - Tamaki Nami - Believe (FREEDOM G CONTROL mix) (4:11)
66. HIM - And Love Said No - And Love Said No (4:11)
67. HIM - Dark Light - Rip Out The Wings Of A Butterfly (3:29)
68. Utada Hikaru - Passion (Planit T Remix) (8:03)
69. Utada Hikaru - Sanctuary (4:16)
70. Legend of Zelda - Ocarina of Time - Forest Temple (1:52)
71. Legend of Zelda - Ocarina of Time - Spirit Temple (2:57)
72. Legend of Zelda - Ocarina of Time - Dungeon Theme - Fire Temple (5:07)
73. Lost Heaven (4:36)
74. Orbital - Halcyon and On and On (9:24)
75. My Chemical Romance - Heaven Help Us (2:56)
76. My Chemical Romance - Dead! (3:15)
77. My Chemical Romance - The Sharpest Lives (3:20)
78. My Chemical Romance - Welcome To The Black Parade (5:11)
79. My Chemical Romance - Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge - I'm Not Okay (I Promise) (3:08)
80. Natasha Bedingfield - Unwritten (4:19)
81. Nobuo Uematsu - One Winged Angel (hardcore Remix) (3:11)
82. Pocahontas - If I Never Knew You (4:11)
83. Staind - Right Here (4:14)
84. Street Fighter Zero 2 - Ken (Beyond Nature Mix) (6:05)
85. Street Fighter Zero 2 - Ryu (Beyond Nature Mix) (6:29)
86. Street Fighter Zero 2 - Sakura (Spilt Poppers Mix) (6:07)
87. Thousand Foot Krutch - Move (3:26)
88. Thousand Foot Krutch - Phenomenon (3:00)
89. YuGiOh - Duel Monsters - [ED 5] - Eyes (4:10)
90. YuGiOh - Duel Monsters - [OP 5] - Overlap (4:22)
91. YuGiOh - The Movie - Shadow Games (3:32)

One little compliment can make you feel amazing. So give me a compliment, anything in the entire world, even that my shoelaces are pretty. Put this in your journal. And once you get some comments, put that entry in a memory or tag and when you are feeling down, just go to that entry and this will remind that you're not so bad in other people's eyes after all.

Comments are going to be screened so none of you will know if I'm uber-popular and get over 100 comments on this or a total loser who doesn't get any.

The Devil Within
By Zelda Martial
Original Story concept and characters by chakrabluwings & pyro_girl
Rating: NC-17 (currently at about PG-13 but will go higher)
Genre: Original Fiction
Author's Note: This is a gay romance fiction. If you don't like the idea, then go away.
Teaser:What made this situation even more taboo was the fact that Hell was the slave of a Demon Lord. Even if unification of angels and demons wasn't forbidden, his Master would have killed her anyway for taking what belonged to Him.


( Chapter One (Incomplete) )


I know this part alone still needs quite a bit of work, but please comment and tell me what you think of the story so far :) If you like, feel free to link it around.

The fuck... I am ssssooooooooooooooooo bored al;sjkdfalkdsfj

-goes off to make icons-

and dude... I had someone randomly comment in my GJ and thought it was cool that I have King of Hell icons AND a King of Hell layout. Apparently I'm the first person he's seen with a KoH layout. Given my GJ name though, the layout should be no surprise XD

He must have found me through GJ's most recent journals post thingy on the main page XD

Songs for you to download if you wish (and I will update as I upload songs). Feel free to pimp this page around:

PLEASE NOTE: I will NOT take requests due to my connection being dial up and it taking me upwards of an hour and a half to upload songs.

Please comment if downloading:

Adema - Immortal [ DOWNLOAD ] (MP3)
My Chemical Romance - Dead [ DOWNLOAD ] (MP3)
My Chemical Romance - Welcome to the Black Parade [ DOWNLOAD ] (MP3)
Stain'd - Right Here [ DOWNLOAD ] (MP3)

Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories Vol.1
Loveless Vol.3 (it's out yay! -saw it at the store today-)
King of Hell Vol.14 (I waited SIX FUCKING MONTHS FOR THIS A:LDFKJS:LDFKJSL:D)
King of Hell Vols.5-8 (because I STILL haven't gotten them despite having the rest of the series XD)
World of Warcraft: Sunwell Trilogy Vol.2

Evanescense: The Open Door
Clay Aiken: A Thousand Different Ways
My Chemical Romance: The Black Parade
My Chemical Romance: Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge
Paramore: All We Know is Falling
Panic! At the Disco: A Fever You Can't Sweat Out
30 Seconds to Mars: Self Titled
Nightwish: Once


Stuff to buy self:
Nintendo DS
Nintendo Wii
Playstation 3
a god forsaken laptop with wireless internet



So yeah, for anyone who needs gift ideas :P (though it's more of a list for self XD)

Zombie Powder FTW!

I love this song from the Shadow the Hedgehog game;

( Chosen One )

Song Here